Monday, March 31, 2008

Exam Hall Worst Case Scenarios

Come exam week, studying is usually the least of my worries. Most of my anxieties are reserved for what might actually go wrong in the exam hall:

Ok maybe I am a little worried about studying, for the wrong paper.

Sunday, March 30, 2008

Being Chinese

On one of our usual car rides to uni, a wild boar suddenly rushed out from the bushes like a deranged.. well, wild boar. Lucky for us the pig stopped at the side of the pavement and avoided the road like superman to kryptonite. If it did otherwise, WE would have rammed it all the way to barnyard heaven. Normie asked what would have we all done if we really did hit super pig.

Th ambience of the car turned quiet for a moment and you could see everyone's answers pop up like bubble speeches in a comic strip. Some with answers like, "I'd move the pig away and keep driving." and the more civic minded ones would reply, "I''d drive to the nearest authority and report the corpse." Though most of the answers made sense, none of them seem to be good enough to be announced out loud.

When the silence passed the 5 second mark, the atmosphere in the car started to feel like a game show. A game show with no time limit and no cash prize but yet it still needs us to have the right answer. That's a terrible game show.

"I'd take it home and cook us dinner," Adrian said.

And with that, everyone's speech bubble, including the civic minded ones, were wiped clean like an eraser to a blackboard and replaced with an image of a succulent, tender, roasted meat.

We are indeed a very scary race of people.

Thursday, March 27, 2008

A Superhero Is Born

Look, on that bed! Is it a bird? Is it a plane? No, it's..

.. Procrastination Man!

Tuesday, March 25, 2008

A Nasty Habit

Most students see teachers/lecturers as painters of our white canvas minds, candles that burn itself to light our dark, and a compass that activates the magnets of curiosity, knowledge, and wisdom in ourselves.

All I see is a huge sleeping pill.

I have decided to start podcasting again! It's an itch I've always wanted to scratch. Don't worry though. So as not to ruin it for some of you guys who come here purely for laughter and not noise pollution, I made my podcast blog somewhere else. Click.

Saturday, March 22, 2008

My Definition of Fishing

We have all heard about the five stages of death right? Well it just occurred to me that fishing is the five stages of death experienced backwards:

I am still impartial as to whether or not it is a good thing. After all, it is the opposite of death.

Anyway, the house mates seem to be very into fishing these days. I'm thinking of maybe one day getting off my lazy ass and joining them in one of their outings.

Friday, March 21, 2008

Sewjin Sings Numb (Badly)

Kim the bastard posted this on his youtube account yesterday:

In my defence, I didn't know I was being recorded at that time. If I did you'll definitely see a more gentler, more refined side of me. Guess it's too late for that now, huh?

PS: Yeah, I do look a little drunk :D

Wednesday, March 19, 2008

Here Comes Hell

I cannot wait for my academic life to be over.

Monday, March 17, 2008

Arm Wrestling

Tired of Adrian bragging about his muscles all the time, I decided to challenge him to an arm wrestling match:

That ought to shut him up.

Saturday, March 15, 2008

Indecisive Skies

I sure showed him.

Thursday, March 13, 2008

Big Muscles, Big Ego

Ever since hitting the gym, Adrian has been nothing but humble about his progress.

(When asking for project measurements)

More like nothing but stupid.

Side note: I have totally forgotten about my blog's birthday which was on the 3rd of March. So er.. happy belated 2nd birthday Just Sewjin! ... I am hopeless. Wouldn't be surprised if one day I forgot my own birthday.

Tuesday, March 11, 2008

My Review of 10,000BC

Remember this scene from 300?

I couldn't find a proper picture of the net, this will have to make do.

I bet plenty of you guys were pissed mad when Leonidas missed that throw. I was. Well here's a story of a guy who was so outraged at the miss, he took it upon himself to remake the same movie, multiply the title by 33.33, rush the entire plot all the way to the exact same scene and correct the mistake.

So at the end of his movie, the hero throws his spear at the baddie from a distance, hits the target and lives happily ever after. The end. That's what 10,000BC basically is, a half-assed version of 300 with a better ending but a terrible storyline. Save your money for Step Up 2.

But there was one thing about the spear scene that I liked. After he stabbed the enemy leader in the heart and the body came rolling down the steps, the hero valiantly declared, "See, he is NOT A GOD!" Being on the agnostic side, I thought it was a great way to prove my side of the story.

So that's why he created gravity.

Sunday, March 09, 2008

T'was An Exciting Night

Last night was fun, wasn't it?

Of course being the pro-BN citizen that I am, I wasn't too happy with the results. I didn't mind that the opposition took over Kedah, Kelantan and Perak. But come on, Penang and Selangor? Were these two states doing that badly under BN in the first place?!

I mean just look at the development BN brought to Penang, the island with city-class infrastructure AND relatively low living cost. Then there's the great job they did on Selangor, the most modern and prosperous state in Malaysia with tons of education, job and business opportunities. Yet, the rakyat still insists on biting the hand that feeds. Bah, I'll never understand politics.

Let's just hope this 'gamble' pays off.

Saturday, March 08, 2008

I Think I Am An Engineer

Out of boredom, I googled for 'engineer jokes' and found some pretty neat ones. Some funny, some hilarious and some just hit too close to home, especially the 'you might be an engineer if...' list. I thought that it would be fun if I took only those relevant to me from the list and compiled them into my very own. So here it goes:

Sewjin realises he's an engineer because..

  1. he has a habit of destroying things in order to see how they work.

  2. his idea of formal clothings is a T-shirt and and a pair of jeans.

  3. the blinking 12:00 on someone's VCR draws him in like a tractor beam to fix it.

  4. he carries on a one-hour debate over the expected results of a test that actually takes five minutes to run.

  5. he can type 70 words a minute but can't read his own handwriting.

  6. when he watches American high school movies, he thinks Spring Break is metal fatigue failure.

  7. he assumes that a “horse” is a “sphere” in order to make the math easier.

  8. he is aware that computers are actually only good for playing games, but is afraid to say it out loud.

  9. people groan at the party when he picks out the music.

  10. he chuckles whenever anyone says "centrifugal force".

  11. he has more friends on the internet than in real life.

  12. it is sunny and 20 degrees celcius outside, and he is working on a computer.

  13. he had a pet named after a scientist (Laplace).

  14. he considers any non-science course “easy.”

  15. he goes on the rides at themeparks but wish to sit backwards so he could see how they do the special effects.

  16. he hasn't bought any new underwear or socks for himself since he went off to university.

  17. he knows that "natural frequency" has nothing to do with bowel movements.

  18. the “fun” center of his brain has deteriorated from lack of use.

  19. his favorite James Bond character is "Q," the guy who makes the gadgets.

I swear, this list is so true it isn't even funny.

Thursday, March 06, 2008

Life Of A Roach

It was too emotional for a cockroach anyway.

Monday, March 03, 2008

Body Crazy

One year ago, my daily routine consisted of napping, overeating, DOTA and nightly mamak sessions. A few months ago it all changed to exercising, exercising, and exercising. The reason?:

(A few months ago)

CK: Dude, you're getting fatter.

Ben: No, I'm not.

CK: *Smacks Ben's tummy. Tummy moves in a jelly-like motion for 5 seconds.*

Ben: I should start exercising.

So for the past 2 months, I have lost quite a significant amount of weight. Though somewhere along the way, I picked up a slight obsession with building muscle mass. I guess seeing how effectively I lost weight inspired me to do something greater for my body.

Okay, that sounded like a cheesy weight loss commercial. Anyway here it is, my (3 month late) new year's resolution, to have a leaner meaner body by the end of 2008. Now to find me a picture of some male model to pin up on my wall. Any suggestions?

On second thought, having a poster of a half naked man looking over my bed would be kinda gay.

Saturday, March 01, 2008

Kill Da Bird!

I hate that there's a tree right outside my window. Ok I don't hate the tree. I just hate that there is an annoying bird residing in it.

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