Saturday, January 20, 2007

When Women Are Hard

Women can be hard sometimes. Men become horny, sex-hungry bastards when they are hard. That's ok. But when women become hard, well, it's a whole other story altogether. All conversations here are via SMS:

(It was June's birthday so I wished her a happy birthday yesterday morning)
Ben: Happy birthday! [Here comes the "aaawww, you remembered? that's so sweet of you!"]
June: Where's my present?
Ben: I'm going out tomorrow with my friends to JB. I'll get you your present then, ok?
June: You mean you don't have my present right now?! That's so insincere of you.
Ben: But I don't have my own transportation here! It's difficult for me to take a trip down the city on my own.
June: It's difficult but not impossible.

(Back from JB yesterday evening with her pressie)
Ben: Ok, I'm back after a long day searching for you present. So tomorrow we'll have lunch together? [Here comes the "aaawww, you spent the entire day looking for my pressie?"]
June: Why don't you ask me to go out tonight? Today is still my birthday, you know.
Ben: Listen, I am really tired right now. One day wouldn't make much difference now would it?
June: It's different to ME!
Ben: Sigh. So.. did you celebrate with your friends over there? [A quick change of topic should ease the tension. I'll just get her to talk about her eventful birthday celebration with her friends.]
June: So now you're pitying me?!
Ben: WHAT?!
June: I can tell by your tone that you're hoping for me to say "No, no one celebrated my birthday." Then you'll go, "See, you should be thankful I remembered your birthday." Well I've got news for you mister. My friends DID remember my birthday and they DID throw me a party with presents and all that jazz. But there was no cake. YOU owe me a cake.
Ben: [I'll stop sending anymore messages.. she won't attack if I do not provoke.]
June: RESPOND! Do you know that it's rude to leave a girl hanging?! You are SO dead tomorrow!

I'm meeting her at 11.30am later. It's 10am now. I am seriously contemplating suicide.

5 comments:

Jason

I hope your dad calls during 12PM and there goes the gf thingy conversation all over again.

ivan

hhahaha LMAO damn funny. all the best dude!

Eve

Goodluck!

Benjamin

jason: you sumpah me ah?! my dad really called halfway through our lunch to ask about something. lucky he didn't ask where i was :D

ivan: go ahead, laugh at my misery :D

eve: not even a four-leaf clover could save me from this. haha. why am i laughing? -cry-

Anonymous

My fellow man,

You're actually DATING this MAH FUN, overly-whimsical, emasculating, self-important, SELFISH person??

I tell you what, there's a LOT of pussy out there waiting for you to fuck, not just one. Especially when you graduate, get a job with a decent income.

It's a different world now from last time where we do all the CHIVALROUS things, and the women APPRECIATED it by being sweet to us. Now, the girls are too SPOILED, they demand us to be "chivalrous", generous and to pander to every one of their little selfish (and nonsensical and impractical) desires.

Let THEM fawn over you, not the other way around , man. Don't take shit from them. Are you the man, or are you the girl?!

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