I Dare Not Go Home

My dad left an SMS this afternoon, telling me to call him after class. It sounded urgent so I immediately hit speed dial as soon as my last period was over:

(Someone picks up the phone)
Bernice (baby sis): BENNY BOY!!
Ben: I don't want you.
Bernice: You're evil benny boy.
Ben: Where's dad?
Bernice: Dad is cooking right now. Please leave a message after the beep. "Beeeeeep" I'm an answering machine!
Ben: You're fantasizing again, aren't you?
Bernice: Fanta.. what? What's the F-word you said?
Ben: Just look up that F-word in a dictionary and stop doing it. And tell dad to call me back when he's done cooking.

(Half an hour later, my phone rang)
Ben: Hello?
Dad: I read in the news that Johor is flooded again. Did it affect your place?
Ben: Nope, it's just focused on Kota Tinggi. Skudai and even JB is perfectly fine.
Dad: So... how did your prom night go?
Ben: Well the food sucked and the programs sucked. And..
Dad: No, I mean did you get to meet any girls there?
Ben: Nope.
Dad: You didn't even take the initiative to talk to at least one?
Ben: Nah, they were all attached.
Dad: Take photos with them?
Ben: Dad, I didn't make any sort of contact with the opposite sex during prom night.
Dad: Ok fine. Then do you if it's possible for me to adopt a grandchild?
Ben: Why does it have to be me?! Maybe Bernice could bear your first grandchild.
Dad: (Looks at Bernice) (Bernice: Daddy, kor kor is right. From now on, I'm never doing the F-word again. Never ever, ever, ever!)
Ben: No.. she.. I..
Dad: -click-