Wednesday, August 02, 2006

My First Teaching Job

Adrian seemed a little panicky as he's starting his tutor job today. Apparently, he has never tutored anyone (for money) before in his life. He has had previous work experiences before either as a waiter or a salesperson but never as a teacher. So he couldn't help but run a disturbing scene through his head, over and over again:

(During tuition)
Adrian: Quickly, what's the square root of 49?
Student: Er.. er.. 6?
Adrian: Wrong!
Student: You're fired!
Adrian: Silly me, I thought you said 7. Yep, 6 IS the square root of 49!
Student: That's 10 bucks added to your monthly pay.

It's understandable, since he has only before worked to serve and please the boss. Normie on the other hand, has had many one on one tutor jobs in the past so he was quick to dish out tips to Adrian. Me, I did take up a teaching job at my old high school and handled a few form 3 and form 4 classes but I don't think my advice would help the least bit. After all, I did eventually quit my job after 2 months realising that teaching just isn't for me. Here are some of the defining moments:

Moment 1:
Ben: [I have to give a good first impression, introduce myself nicely]
Ben: My name is Ben and I'll be your substitute teacher for today. I want you all to know that you are all welcomed at my office if you need any help be it about my lessons or your homeworks.
Ben: [There we go, they seem to like you. Now all you gotta do is mantain that clean image of yours]
Ben: I'll just pick up from the chapter your teacher last left you with. (Flips to bookmarked page; "Chapter 3: Sexual Organs")
Ben: Damn it.

Moment 2:
Ben: So that's it about our urethra. Any questions?
Student: Teacher!
Ben: Yes?
Student: Why do we go (softly vibrates body) right after we pee?
Ben: Well that's all for today's class. Goodbye.

Moment 3:
Ben: Photosynthesis is the synthesis of compounds with the aid of radiant ener..
Guy Student: TEACHER! THIS (pointing) GIRL LOVES YOU!
Entire Class : Uuuuuuuuuu!!
Girl Student: -Shrieks- [Starts whacking guy student on the shoulders]
Ben: ...

Moment 4:
Ben: Finally, my first monthly paycheque. RM180.

Fine, I started work on the 15th but still, get ready to be severely underpaid when you're working part time in government schools. Anyway I'm keeping my mouth shut, wouldn't want to freak Adrian out.



Haha, I love Moment #3


actually that moment also included tons of anonymous miss calls late at night. what's with you school girls and young male teachers?!

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