Thursday, August 02, 2007

Kinkier Side of Uni. None.

In a lecture on 'interviews' today, our lecturer split the entire class into two groups; the interviewers and the interviewees. The interviewer group (me!) was required to prepare a set of 3 questions to ask the other group. A dull activity, yeah. That is why the gang and I decided to set our questions based on one theme alone, Sex & Relationships.

The lecturer gave us 5 minutes to prepare our questions and then set us off to the other group. It was tough. Some were too shy to ask the questions, some were too shy to answer the questions and some even lied. Sex is such a taboo subject here in Malaysia. But of course, there were some who were willing to answer the questions, most of it anyway:

(Overheard in an interview)

Guy 1: Do you have a girlfriend?

Guy 2: Yes.

Guy 1: How many months have you guys been dating?

Guy 2: 6 months.

Guy 1: Are you both having sex?

Guy 2: Yes.

[Girl nearby looks at Guy 2 disgustedly.]

Guy 2: NOO! I mean.. no, we are not having sex.

Guy 1: But you just said you were.

Guy 2: I thought you asked, "Are your boots properly waxed?"

Guy 1: You own boots?

Guy 2: Hey, that's 4 questions!

At one point, no student in the class was available for interview. Normie then decided to interview the lecturer, with his special set of questions of course:

(Normie interviews the lecturer)

Normie: Hello, sir. I would like to interview you.

Lecturer: Go ahead.

Normie: Do you think masturbation is healthy?

Lecturer: What?! I.. er.. I guess.

Normie: How many times do you masturbate in a day?

Lecturer: Huh.. ah.. er.. skip.

Normie: You can do that?

Lecturer: I SAID SKIP! Next question!

Normie: Ok, where do you masturbate?

Lecturer: Room. NEXT!

Normie: Sir, is it on the bed or in the toilet?

Lecturer: I SAID NEXT!

My set of questions were relatively tame. They were; How many exes do you have? Why did you guys break up? and How many of them are you still friends with? But even so, a lot of my interviewees had a hard time answering them:

(Me interviewing the people around)

Ben: How many exes do you have?

Student 1: None.

Ben: How many exes do you have?

Student 2: -ponders-

Ben: ...

Student 2: -still pondering-

Ben: ...

Student 2: None.

Ben: How many exes do you have?

Student 3: Do I look like a woodcutter to you?

Ben: What? No! I mean E-X-E-S.

Student 3: Oooh. Hahaha!

Ben: Yeah. Hahaha!

Student 3: None.

I'm gonna interview more guys around the mechanical engineering faculty before drawing the obvious painful conclusion.


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